Tuesday 28 December 2021

Ten Out Of Ten

Marie's Wicked Wednesday prompt #500, is for lists of Top 10 posts. "The Cunning Linctus" blog passed it's 10th anniversary in May this year, so I'll give Top 10 lists for both the 10 years and for 2021.

Top 10 Most Popular posts
Rank10 years, 2011-20212021
1Cunnilingus 101Oh God! I'm Cumming
2O-O-O-OMG! The Female OrgasmGoldilocks and the Three Bares
34 O'Clock in the Morning
4Christmas Drinks At The YYum! Cum!
5I Lust, Therefore I AmSummer Holiday pt.6 - Never on Sunday
6The Pole DancerSextreme Sport - The Ride
7A Bad HabitO-O-O-OMG! The Female Orgasm
8Cunning Conversations - "I'll Have What He's Having"The Man with the Golden Tongue
9That SmileSummer Holiday pt.2 - The Morning After the Night Before
10How Long is Enough?We're All Going on a Summer Holiday

Lessons Learned

  1. I started blogging when I realised how much time I spent reading about other people's experiences and thoughts, but I wasn't contributing anything myself. The world is full of 'consumers' and very few 'producers'. As a 'sex' blogger, I had started writing personal journal reviews of my sexual experiences, especially since I had come out of sexless marriage and was discovering what I had been missing out on, through the world of transactional sex. So my public blogging started out as an extension of those reviews.
  2. I was very fortunate in finding some wonderfully helpful, very sexual ladies. I learned so many new things, but also in our discussions discovered how uninformed and inexperienced so many 'punters' were. So I started some sex educational type posts, which top my all-time list, confirming what these ladies had been telling me.
  3. As I started to see the interest my posts were gärning, I started to realise the need to promote my writing. I started thinking about key phrases and common search terms (this was before SEO became the tool de rigueur of top bloggers). This was also the time I was becoming more aware of a community of sex bloggers and discovered 'memes' as a means of promoting my work. Most recently, I started dabbling into Twitter as a communications medium. Which immediately leads into the next phase, use of 'Medium'.
  4. As I studied other's blogs (more than just reading), it got me thinking back to my professional work as a technical writer, and how so much of what I learnt and used back then, also applied to good blog writing.
  5. From memes and the challenges of writing styles, I took on some of the challenges of writing to a prompt instead of just from my own personal experiences. This led into tackling some pure fictional writing, and 70% of my 2021 list are fictional pieces.
    My fictional series about the "Circle of Friends with Benefits" who end up going on a "Summer Holiday", totals 20 posts (3 appear on my 2021 Top 10 list). I've since compiled them into an 'epub' e-book that I'm considering publishing (free). 

Thank You

I conclude with a very big THANK YOU, to all my readers, casual and regular. Of my readers, a special Thank You to those who took the time to submit a comment of feedback and encouragement, (of my c.200 posts I average 1 comment/post, from 140,000 page views).  Thank you also to the community of sex bloggers for your encouragement and example.

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Merry Kissmas

What with covid lock-down and my post prostate cancer treatment ED, it's been 3 months since my last 'test drive', which whilst nice, didn't reach a 'happy ending'. But with restrictions easing, bordellos reopening and my birthday and Christmas coming up, I felt I needed to see if I could finally reach that 'happy ending'!

With Cialis the night before, Viagra on the morning and an hour free in my carer schedule, I set off to visit a new (for me) establishment that had a couple of well reviewed girls.

Being a Monday, so soon after post restrictions reopening, there were only 2 ladies on roster. I selected Emma who seemed a bit more outgoing and her English was not quite as bad as the other girl.

I was barely undressed when she returned and directed me straight onto the bed.  It was straight into cuddles and nipple licking. She pushed her enhanced boobs in my face and directed her very long erect dark brown nipples to my mouth. Kissing was very 'light', though I later found she has a strange style of putting her tongue out a little to 'kiss'. Later in the heat of passion it was more deep French kissing.

We had a little chat with her poor English. When she discovered that I was twice her age, she said that I looked younger. I explained that whilst my tongue was still young, the 'old fella' was definitely showing his age. Since my prostate cancer treatment, I explained that I had difficulty getting erections and seldom came. Since the vasectomy, 'No babies', and with roast prostate 'No creampies'! I need medication to help get it up and my cock-ring to keep it up once it gets hard.

She obviously took this as a challenge. She immediately swung round to go down on me and threw a leg over pushing her yummy pussy in my face. Well her oral technique was wonderfully effective. Her pussy is to die for. It's orientation was good in that I could alternate between licking and sucking her clit and labia, to deep tongue fucking.

When I looked up, I saw that the manager(?) had attached a piece of mistletoe to the end of the ceiling mounted mirror above us, not that I needed further encouragement in my Australian kissing!


I was getting a good response from her, so after a while I tried some fingering whilst I licked. I found her G-spot and she thrust back on my face and sucked harder like a hoover. I added a little rimming and with FIP and licking and sucking her clit, her body shuddered in orgasm.

Well our 69 must have lasted 15 minutes, when she finally came up asking "We fuck now?". Well we started with missionary with some breast work and more kissing. Whilst we had some good deep groin slapping fun, it wasn't really getting us there. So she swung around to the side so that we were joined in a sort of scissor position (a new one for me). In this position, my cock seemed to stimulate her clit and g-spot better and she said she came again.

She then swung round again to squat on me in the Asian cow-girl position. This really seemed to hit her spot again.

With 5 minutes left and I confirmed that I still hadn't come, she suggested a hand-job finish. I suggested it would be best if I did it myself, so condom off and lubed my hand. She rolled to one side and grabbed my left hand and pushed it under her pussy for some more fingering. I get 2 fingers in and the position is perfect. She leans over me to watch my hand work, then sticks her tongue out to lick my glans. We ended up coming together. She was surprised to see that mine was virtually a 'dry orgasm' with barely a half teaspoon of 'pre-cum' (toast prostate is virtually non-functional).

She claimed she came three times in all, though they were of the quiet gentle type, not body shaking, hip thrusting, nose punching type. But that's OK, I've seen (and tasted) all types (see "OMG, The Female Orgasm").

As I jumped in the shower, she came straight in with me and gave me a good all-over lathering and another little tug.

After we dried off, she proceeded to help me dress, then combed my hair. Nice little touches. As I was leaving, she repeated her name several times to make sure I remembered her (how could I forget a fuck like that). 

Happy birthday to me and Merry Kissmas to you!

mmmMondays

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Saturday 20 November 2021

VPL or VNBs? Kink preference?

This week's Kink of the Week prompt of 'VPL' (Visible Panty Lines) got me thinking about the broader issue of what a person's clothes say or imply about what is underneath them.

But first, VPL - frankly they do nothing for me. If anything, the lack of PLs says more. A smooth, butt hugging skirt or slacks with no PLs is much more of a turn-on. And white shows the lack of PLs much better.

Mind you, a beautiful body hugging lace or crochet gown (think gala night red carpet), that with the right movement and light allows a glimpse and a hint of the thong worn under it, is very sexy.

If we extend the idea of panties a little, then there is nothing sexier than short shorts, bikini, gym or sports wear that shows off a camel toe. I'm sure such ladies flash them just to get a glimpse of the bulge growing in a man's shorts.

In the broader sense of using clothes to emphasize what's underneath, nothing surpasses women's breast wear. From bras that go from lace to sheer material, balconette, push-up, cut-away and other secret women's business that we mere males never know the details but appreciate the result. Then these are topped with a variety of outer coverings (or barely covering), from bust hugging to emphasize the rounded volume, to deep scooped decolletage or navel deep plunging slits, that draws one's eyes down to caress the cleavage. And these days we have the under-boob and exposed side views.

Elyse Taylor, VNBs through a sheer bra

Generally, males have never had or used such body emphasizing clothes. The few exceptions might be some rock performers that stuff their crotch. Then the athletic males with well developed abs might wear a netting tank-top - the shadows of the netting emphasizes their sculpted body.

But getting back to VPL, I much prefer VNBs (Visible Nipple Bumps). Whether through a sheer bra or commando, they are lip smacking sexy.

Strangely, in my senior years, possibly related to my prostate ED no longer getting a normal rise from the sight of a sexy woman, and that in retirement I mostly wear polo shirts with a rougher material than cotton business shirts, I now find my own nipples more sensitive and arousable. When I go the the bathroom, I can't help but notice my own VNBs in the mirror and enjoy a little flick and rub. I don't know whether women notice men's VNBs or find them arousing. I hope so - I look forward to the occasional nibble!


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Friday 22 October 2021

The Hot Steamy Railway Museum

I'm not particularly 'in' to musty, dusty traditional museums, but there is something about their 'honesty' that I appreciate. You see that the human body and sexuality has been appreciated since the start of time. From nude paintings and statues, to historical wooden and stone dildos and phallic idols.

But personally, I prefer a 'manly' museum of steam engines and their ilk. And of course, they are at their best when in action.

To see the piston rods glistening with lube sliding in and out of the cylinders, then the sigh of steam exhaust after each thrust, is quite arousing. But it's really a male thing to think that the piston rod is doing the work. In fact it is the vagina cylinder that does all the work, alternatively sucking him it in and pushing it out. Then it is the connecting rods that turn the wheels and make the world go round. The rocking of the valve gear moving in opposition to the piston rods, also in sync with the sound, is quite hypnotic.

Image from 'trumptN.net' - click for animation and sound.

The steam experience is a multi-sensory thing. From the heat of steam and smell of coal, to the sound of huff, chuff, shhhh, sigh, then as the speed builds up, the thumping rhythm - if you listen closely I'm sure you can hear it saying, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! As the speed of the piston thrusting in and out, builds and builds and builds, faster and faster, the whole engine body is shaking, until there is the climax of the boiler pressure releasing through the whistle with an ejaculation of steam and I'm sure I heard it squeal, "Yeeeeeeeees!".

After we gather our composure having experienced that orgasmic steam exhibition, my steam wench and I board the special steam train for the trip home. We find an empty compartment and pull the blinds down for privacy. With the windows open a little, we get the smell of steam and coal again. 

She straddles my lap and we kiss passionately. My own piston rod is hardening and my wench works her pubes against me. My boiler pressure is rising. She steps off me for a minute to uncover her self-lubricating sex cylinder. Meanwhile, I have unzipped my piston cover. With a little saliva I quickly get it glistening with lube. My wench kneels over me again, and just as our parts meet, the carriage shakes and the couplings rattle as we start to move out of the station. Our own coupling slides together and we can hear the engine in front of our carriage, huffing and puffing, alternately shhh-ing and sighing. Our own speed builds up as the train speeds up. The clickety-clack as the train rolls over rail joints, rumbles up through the seat, my buttocks and rattles our coupling. My wench is rising and falling on me, thrusting in and out in time with the sound of the engine. Our speed is building. My rod is now steel hard and red hot.

Our passion is at boiling point, when suddenly the engine whistle blows just as we cum together, a three-way orgasmic blast!

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PS. 'Steam Wench' - Maaaaaaany years ago, in my youth, I volunteered at a steam museum. One day, we were restoring an old steam engine powered winch, as used in mines. Being an all male group, one of the wags exclaimed "What we need around here are more Steam Wenches!".


Saturday 16 October 2021

Elust 142 - "The Man with the Golden Tongue"

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Tuesday 12 October 2021

Oh God, I'm Cumming!

Frank and Fran were both in their autumnal years, and both widowed for almost ten years each, when they moved into the retirement village. Like all fellow residents, they were still healthy enough and mobile to varying degrees, that they could live independently with weekly home-care assistance with house work. But it was the community life and social programmes that made village life so attractive.

From the very first Friday night 'Happy Hour', there was a spark of attraction between them. Common interests and conversation flowed so easily. On the first 'social club' bus trip outing, they just naturally gravitated to the same seat. At lunch, Frank, the gentleman, formally seated Fran at their table. Their fingers touched across the table. That afternoon as they walked through the gardens, their hands reached for each other.

The other villagers smiled and gave the new lovers room. There were all types in the village. There were younger active couples that spent most days on the golf course. There were couples into their 50 or 60 years of marriage. More than half were single, most recently widowed, some having lost their loved one soon after arriving in the village - their move to village life was often at the ailing one's insistence, to ensure their partner would be surrounded by community when their time came to pass on, perhaps even to find a new partner. Whilst a village this size might average 7 or 8 deaths per year, there was also the occasional marriage. Then there were the informal pairs and villagers discretely smiled when they saw someone slipping out of another's villa in the early morning.

And so Fran and Frank's romance blossomed. When they discovered they shared the same birthday, both day and year, Frank said "This is destiny. Francis and Frances both born on exactly the same date". They started sharing meals together at each other's villas, which they still retained separate ownership.

Their birthdays were coming up and their children had planned a big family dinner party in the village community centre. The evening before, after dinner together at Fran's villa, she asked Frank "Why don't you stay the night?". 

Frank replied, "I'm so glad you asked. I've wanted to for some time, but I didn't want to appear too forward". 

"Forward? We don't have time for such niceties!".

"Can I help you with a shower" asked Frank.

"Would you mind?".

"Of course not!". All the villas had large disabled access showers with wheelchair sized openings and hand rails. Fran had a shower chair. Frank got the shower water warm, then helped undress Fran and taking her walking stick, helped her into her shower chair. He quickly undressed himself and stepped in with her. Taking the shower hose and soap, he started to lather her wrinkled body.

At dinner, Frank had surreptitiously taken a Viagra, in hopeful anticipation. In spite of his own sagging skin, his erection was rising. When Fran saw this, she reached out her wrinkled hand and started to stroke it.

"So this is what a naked cock looks like?" said Fran. "You know, Jack (her first husband) and I had a very old fashioned vanilla marriage. Would you believe that in all those years, we never really saw each other naked, and definitely not together. We just slipped our pants off in bed and had sex still half dressed."

Frank responded, "Well my Sally and I were much the same. But about 5 years after she died, I missed the sex so much, I started to go and see prostitutes. I met some wonderful, understanding, helpful mature ladies and I learned so much that Sally and I had never even thought about, let alone tried".

"Would you show me and teach me? I want to try out some new things before I go!".

Frank rinsed themselves off, towel dried Fran, then himself, then carried her to the bedroom. He threw all the covers off the bed, the weather was still warm, and placed Fran in the middle. He went to the window and drew the curtains wide open, allowing the full moon-light to stream in.

He lay down beside her and as they cuddled into each other, Fran said, "Wow!, Would you believe I have only ever had sex before under the covers! And curtains open - oh my God, there might be a 'peeping Tom' out there looking at us! This is sort of scary, but . . . .  well so nice and new and different!".

They exchanged gummy kisses - they had left their dentures in the bathroom after dinner. Frank nibbled Fran's neck and ears, then slowly kissed his way to her breasts. Although the swell and smooth skin of younger years had been replaced with wrinkles and sags, the enjoyable sensation of touch still raised a tingle.

Their arms were round each other now, with hands caressing backs and buttocks. They had rolled into each other, breasts to chest, pubes to pubes, and kissing more passionately. Long lost, almost forgotten feelings were stirring and slight arousal rising.

"Ready for your first lesson?" asked Frank. "Oh yes!" replied Fran.

Frank knelt on the bed next to Fran and offered his cock. "Technically, this is called fellatio, also a 'blow job' or plain cock sucking". Fran reached out her hand and stroked Frank. "I've never seen a cock up this close before" she said, as she ran her fingers around his glans, then the frenulum and felt the bulging veins along the back.

Fran lent forward and tentatively licked the tip. "Use some saliva to lubricate it a bit" instructed Frank as he spat into his hand and rubbed it up his shaft. Fran spat on the glans and took the full glans in her mouth, gently sucking and swirling her tongue around it. "Now wrap your hand around the shaft and work it up and down as you slide you mouth up and down me".

"Oh wow. Are you sure you've never done this before?" asked Frank.

"Never".

"Now gently bite my shaft with your gums as you slide up and down."

"Oh God, you're a fast learner". Frank reached round and with his right hand caressed across Fran's pubes and found her outer labia covering her clit. Bringing his hand to his mouth, he provided some saliva and returned to lubricate her slit till his finger tips rubbed the nub of her clit.

"Now it's my turn to give you the oral treatment, also called cunnilingus". Jack gently pulled himself from Fran's mouth and positioned himself between her legs, gently spreading them, exposing her sex for his delectation.

Frank gently placed his mouth over Fran's vulva, spreading her outer lips with his fingers. He kissed and licked and sucked up and down both labia and her clitoris.

Fran began to wriggle and squirm. "Oh God. Why didn't Jack know how to do this? Sex has never ever felt this good! And you haven't even started to fuck me yet".

Frank licked and sucked up and down her labia, either side of her urethra, just barely licking her vaginal entrance. With a good dose of saliva, he provided the lubrication that her body no longer excreted naturally. Still licking the length of her slit, he slipped a finger into her cunt, then a second finger. His finger tips found the knobbly surface on the top of her vaginal entrance, where her G-spot resided. With curled finger tips, he massaged that spot in a 'come hither' motion. Fran lifted her hips and pushed back onto Frank's probing fingers. With 5 or 6 minutes of Frank's licking and fingering, Fran felt her body tensing up. Her cunt clamped around Frank's fingers then her whole body started shaking.

As her body slowed down, Fran exclaimed, "Oh my God. Is that what they call an orgasm? What have I been missing out on all these years? Thank you Frank! Thank you, thank you, thank you for giving me these new feelings. I need you to fuck me now. I want to feel that big thick cock in my cunt! Oh God. Listen to me. I've never ever used those sort of words before. You're turning me into a real slut . . . and I'm loving it!".

Frank kissed his way across her pubes, across her stomach, licked and sucked each nipple before reaching her waiting mouth, just as the knob of his cock nudged her vaginal opening. It initially slid up across her vulva, nudging her clitoris. He raised his hips allowing his knob to slip back down to the entrance to her tunnel of love. He gently slid in with the combination of his own and some of her natural lubrication.

Now fully coupled, Fran had her arms right around Frank's back, pulling him against her body as they passionately kissed. She lifted and thrust her hips against him, and wrapped her legs around his thighs, grinding her pubes and clit against his pubic bone, and sliding his thick shaft in out out of her cunt. They must have fucked with increasing passion for about 5 minutes, which was about the limit of their aging stamina.

Fran felt another big orgasm building up in her, starting with vaginal twitching and squeezing of Frank's thickness. With a massive final thrust, they came together with his glans hitting her c-spot (cervix), and her body went into full torso convulsions. They exclaimed in unison, "Oh God. I'm cumming!", then collapsed in (not so) 'petit mort'.

It was about 11am the next morning when Judy, Fran's youngest daughter arrived to prepare for the luncheon birthday party. She had a large birthday cake, with "Fran <heart> Frank" in red icing piped across it. There were no candles, since Judy thought 180 candles, between them, was too much of a fire risk.

When there was no answer to her knock, Judy let herself. She found Fran and Frank, still naked, wrapped in each other's arms, expired on the bed. The ambulance was called, and heart attacks diagnosed. The bodies were removed, but family were already arriving at the community centre for the party. Judy wrapped up the paper work and went down to make an announcement to the family.

"Unfortunately, Fran and Frank wont be able to attend their birthday party" Judy announced. "They passed away over night".

"Oh my God!" said Frank Jnr. "How did they die?".

"They had been having sex and died of heart attacks".

"Go Nanna!" exclaimed 18 year old great-grand-daughter Francesca.

That was enough to break the shock and initial grief. It was decided to continue to have a memorial 'wake' party to celebrate their lives.

---

As Fran and Frank approached the Pearly Gates, Frank was surprised to see a very young, beardless, naked St.Peter, the total opposite of all the traditional images of St. Peter.

"Welcome, Frances and Francis! I'm St. Peter. Father heard you cumming!
You were born into the world in love and have died in love. Welcome to the world of Eternal Love".

Frank turned to Fran and was surprised to see a beautiful, young, voluptuous, naked Frances. Looking down at himself he saw himself 70 years younger, with a full head of hair, ripped abs, no wrinkles, no arthritis, perfect eyesight and hearing. As the gates swung open, they were met by Jack and Sally, also naked and young and perfectly healthy and blemish-less. They embraced each other. There was no consciousness of their nakedness, no lust, no jealousy, no selfish thoughts, just all encompassing pure Love!

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Wednesday 15 September 2021

Elust 141 - Summer Holiday pt.6 - Never on Sunday

Image courtesy of Sissitrix.

Welcome to Elust 141.

Elust is the only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #142? Start with the rules, come back October 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

Erotic Fiction

Coffee Break

Summer Holiday pt.6 - Never on Sunday

Dear Diary

All I Need

Erotic Non-Fiction

Hotwife Filming Couple in Portugal

Party Chat: Nerves and a Decision

Honey Birdette BDSM Cuffs and Collar

Fly Me to You Tour to Krakow, Poland

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

Anal Prep: An Illustrated Guide by @BlindJaw

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

I Could Have Been Over Him By Now

My Most Expensive Sex Toys: Are They Worth It?!

Books and Movies

Lady Chatterley’s Lover by D. H. Lawrence

Elust 136


Wednesday 8 September 2021

The Man with the Golden Tongue

(The 'Write Big Sexy Words' (#WBSW) challenge for September 2021 is to include as many of the following BSWs as possible in a post - squelch, blandish, lubricious, fecund, sybaritic, dollop, spume, turpitude & dishabille.)

The Man with the Golden Tongue

His perspicacious polemic was palpable,
Though much more didactic than spiteful;
He blandished with lubricious ease
His seductive golden tongue to please;
His sybaritic dishabille concubines
Swooned at the turpitude of his uprising sublime.
Though linearly challenged,
His fecund phallus
Spumed dollops of jissom so delightful,
That they squealed and squelched
And slurped with glee
To be recipients of his glorious seed!
Thomas Aurelius Lingua
"Sybaritic dishabille concubine"
WW2 era pin-up art by Gil Elvgren
WBSW
Wicked Wednesday

Lustitude The Meme

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Thursday 2 September 2021

Summer Holiday pt.7 - Home Again, Home Again

In part 20 of the story of the Lifestyle Circle on a summer holiday (pt.7), the long weekend holiday comes to a close and it's time to go home and collect the children.

----xxxXxxx----

"To market, to market, to buy a fat pic.
Home again, home again, jiggity jig" 

Olde English nursery rhyme, initially published 1611

Pat and Trevor had set up their own bed on the floor on the other side of the room. After the fun and games of dinner the night before, everyone just flopped on the nearest bed to sleep. Fanny woke to find herself in between Tim and Jack, with two hard 'morning woods' probing her thighs. She glanced over to the other bed and saw that Tess and Emily had one Dick between them. She smiled to herself and gave her hips a little wriggle as she felt the wetness quickly building in her.

"Morning Fanny" said Dick and Jack, each reaching an arm around her, squeezing a breast each and pressing their warm bodies in closer. "It's sort of sad that we're going home today and the weekend's over. So you two had better give me a really good fucking for me to remember this weekend by". She flung an arm around Jack and kissed him very passionately, whilst lifting a leg over him to rub her labia over his cock.

Tim pushed her from behind, rolling her on top of Jack. She took immediate advantage of the change of position to work her aching cunt onto Jack.

Tim moved to the top of the bed, saying "How about we have 'spit roast' for breakfast", offering his own erection to Fanny's mouth, which she immediately devoured with relish.  Tim and Jack soon got into the swing with Fanny rocking back and forth being alternately impaled by a cock from both ends.

Fanny glanced to her left and saw Tess and Emily straddling Dick, with their cunts being plundered by his cock and tongue.

"Switch!" called Tim, and Jack and Tim withdrew, swung Fanny around on the bed and resumed the spit roast reversed. Fanny felt her 1st orgasm building. She had to release Jack from her mouth as she groaned and her body changed from its rocking spit-roast action, to shaking convulsions of orgasm. As her orgasm subsided, Jack called "Switch!" and the men twirled Fanny around again and Jack plunged in again to enjoy another orgasm that flooded though her.

The two men raised their hands and 'high-fived' each other. "DP?" asked Tim. He withdrew from Fanny's mouth and came around to help roll Jack on his back, and rotating Fanny on Jack's cock, remaining coupled, into a 'reverse-cow-girl' position. Tim moved between Fanny and Jack's legs.

Fanny lay back on Jack's chest exposing her pussy, still impaled by Jack, for full access by Tim.  "Oh yeh! Come on! Fill me up, both of you. Oh God, yes. I need to feel totally filled. Come on, Give it to me!". Tim reached around for the tube of lube and applied a liberal amount to himself, Fanny and Tim's still impaled cock. Spreading her labia, he took his cock in hand and worked his glans between her labia then pressing against Jack's cock, worked his way into her now very tight pussy. Having achieved full penetration, the two men took up a synchronous fucking action. "Oh my God!". "Fuck yes". "More, more. Give it to me!". "Oh yes, I'm coming". There was general "Oooing" and "Arghing" from all directions.

Fanny looked to the other bed again and saw that Dick was bucking and thrusting under Emily and Tess. The girls seemed to be shuddering with their own orgasms, shouting in ecstasy.

Fanny's own orgasm built up and up till she exploded with her whole body convulsing. Tim and Jack held onto the bed tightly so they could retain their penetration to enjoy the throbbing, pulsing convulsion of Fanny's fanny till she had drained their cum.

Jack felt Tim's cock starting to twitch next to his and couldn't hold back his own orgasm building up. With a couple more synchronous thrusts, they came together, filling Fanny with a super-duper sloppy double cream-pie.

The shouting slowed and was replaced by "Wow!" and "Oh my God, that was awesome!". Bodies uncoupled and flopped flat on the beds.

It was Tess that finally spoke up. "Wow! In all our time together as a fuck-buddies group, I can't remember us ever having had such an awesome 'cuming together'."

"A perfect way to finish our holiday weekend!" responded Fanny.

"A sextet you might say" laughed Jack.

"Here, here!" echoed around the room, including Trev and Pat, who had been enjoying their own thing in the other corner.

It was more than half an hour before there was a general move to get up, to toilet and wash. Some brunch was prepared and coffee brewed, and the group moved out to the veranda to eat.

After their meal, the girls wanted to wash. Fortunately, the Saturday night storm had replenished the water tank supply, so there was sufficient for a bucket wash each. Tim, spoke up with "Hey girls, I found a shower bag. Do you want to try this?".

"What is that?" asked Pat.

"Here, I'll show you" said Tim, as he filled the bag with water and hung it from the pole in the yard that no-one seemed to know what it was for. He turned the little tap on the bag and a light shower flowed.

"Wow. Why didn't we have this on Friday night?" shouted Tess. Fanny was first to hop under, but the cold slow flow was only just enough for a basic body wash. Tess managed a wash too before the bag had to be refilled. Pat and Emily followed. "God, I can't wait for a hot shower and to wash my hair properly when I get home" stated Fanny firmly.

The guys satisfied themselves with a quick sponge wash.

Fed and clean, they dressed in civies, ready for the drive home. They packed their bags and  loaded the cars and bid the holiday house farewell.

They stopped off in the little beach-side town when they saw a farmers' market. They noticed a fish-monger, so stocked up on fish, fruit and vegetables (but no fat pig) for their meals that night.

And so they finally made their way home again, home again, jiggity jig.

Pulling up at Tess and Tim's house, they moved their personal gear into their individual cars. Pat had come with Emily and Jack, but she leaned into Trevor and said "Would you like to take me home? Oh, and how do you like your eggs for breakfast?".

"Love to. And over-easy if you don't mind!" replied Trev. "But can we go to my house first? I need to get my work clothes for tomorrow". Pat excused herself to Emily, and climbed into Trevor's car and they drove off.

Fanny and Dick went home to their own hot showers.

Tess and Tim, and Emily and Jack drove to school, where they met the bus just as it arrived from the camp. All the children were full of excitement and couldn't stop telling stories of camp all through dinner. But they were tired, so after bath time they were sent to bed, and both couples finally got to have their own hot showers together as couples, then a beautiful evening of love-making in their god-given birthday suits!


Erotic Fiction
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Friday 27 August 2021

Summer Holiday pt.6 - Never on Sunday

In part 6 of the Lifestyle Circle's summer holiday, after Saturday night's Couples Night, the question hangs in the air, "What will Sunday bring?".

----xxxXxxx----

Emily slowly crosses the thresh-hold from deep sleep to that half awake world of REM sleep. Jack's body is tight in behind her, sharing their warmth. In her half dream state, fragments of memories of the past two days come back. The warm spooning fucking of Friday night. Of waking Saturday morning with the guys going out, then the girls comforting Fanny then joining together in a fabulous orgy of pleasuring each other. Then the guys returning with oysters, of their oysters and champagne breakfast, then more joyous fucking with them, of oystergasms. Saturday afternoon on the beach was lovely and warm and relaxing. Then there was that wonderful bathing in the pool of spring water, of soaping each other up, of dancing with joy, then cleansed and refreshed by the rain. Saturday finished with the gentle loving of their couples night.

But as she became more wakeful, there was no morning glory of wet desire. Her private parts weren't sore as such, but for the moment, she was fucked out. The words of that film title drifted across her consciousness, "Never on Sunday". She drifted off into deeper sleep again, totally relaxed in the warmth of Jack's body.

Emily's feeling must have been common through the group, since the sun was well up before there was some general stirring. No-one was jumping up, there was no sound of sexual activity.

Eventually Emily climbed off the bed, and due to the  coolness of the morning after the heat of the day before, she reached into her bag and slipped on a long thin tee shirt that doubled as a skirt, not bothering with underwear, and slipped off to the bathroom.

When she came back, others were up sitting on the edge of bed, stretching and yawning. Seeing Emily dressed, the others, feeling the freshness of the day, decided to follow suit.

Perhaps it was nudity that was Never on Sunday!

The guys, perhaps due to aching arms and legs from their board riding, were last to arise. The girls sliced fruit for breakfast, with orange juice, and coffee was put on to percolate. Perhaps, champagne was 'Never on Sunday' either - well at least in the morning.

The girls took their breakfast out to sit on the east-side veranda, taking in some warming sun-shine. They smiled as they saw the guys slip out, one by one, dressed just in shorts, to go out back and 'water the lemon tree'. They eventually joined the girls with mugs of coffee. Emily suspected that there were some hang-overs as well.

The guys were talking of going surfing again, but none of the girls were interested in the beach today. The light northerly breeze was rolling some waves down the length of the cove - should be perfect for surfing. Tess piped in, "Would you mind building a good fire in the pit before you go. I want to do some baking this afternoon and I'll make a stew for dinner. So I'll need a good supply of solid wood to get a good bed of embers". The guys raced out back to the wood heap - the sooner this chore was done, the sooner they could hit the beach.

As the guys collected their surfboards, Trevor excused himself with "I'm not surfing today. Pat and I are going for a bit of a hike to explore the sand dunes".

"Likely story" thought Dick to himself. The guys took towels and bottles of water, skipping lunch, and headed off. The others snacked on some sandwiches before their afternoon plans. Pat and Trevor with a blanket and water bottle, headed off into the sand dunes. Emily wasn't in to cooking, so took a book out onto the veranda.

Tess and Fanny scrounged through the cupboards and found a couple of cast iron 'camp ovens' - heavy pots that can sit in the middle of the fire pit. One would be perfect for the stew. The other pot gave Tess the idea of making a loaf of damper bread. Fanny found some individual pie flans which would be good for dessert pies.

They found a bag of flour, salt and oil. They divided up the ingredients and Tess mixed up some dough and proceeded to knead the dough for the bread. Fanny made up a different dough for pie crusts, which was then divided, half to top the stew and half for her dessert pie flans.

With the bread dough set aside to rise, they worked the pastry dough and put it aside. It was now time to turn to the stew. Tess lightly braised the steaks and sausages recovered from the rain-soaking from the day before. Once browned, she cubed the meat. 

Fanny started preparing the vegetables, peeling and cubing potatoes and onions. Carrots were scraped and diced and placed in the seasoned broth in the pot. She reached into the bag for the last carrot, and on pulling it out, gasped, "Wow! Look at this. Who do you think this reminds you of, Tim or Dick?". Fanny took her paring knife and proceeded to very carefully carve the end of the carrot into a penile glans shape. "Definitely your Dick" replied Tess. "No, I think it looks more like Tim". Fanny lifted the carrot cock to her lips and with some slow licking, pronounced "Yep, definitely Tim".

"Well I think this requires some in-depth investigation" came back Tess, taking the carrot from Fanny. She lifted her top and rubbed its glans across her slit. She drizzled some saliva over it and gently worked it into her cunt. "Well the tip is definitely your Dick, but the shaft is definitely thicker like my Tim. And I've fucked his more than you so I would know!".

"Are you saying my Dick's cock is thin?" came back Fanny. "Here, Let me try it too!" she continued, taking the now slick vegan dildo from Tess and applying it to her own cunt. "Fuck, I think your right!" she exclaimed.

"You really are a wicked woman" said Tess, taking the carrot back, thinking twice about washing it. "This will be OK once it's cooked" she continued as she placed it across the pastry topping the stew. "I think our natural 'seasoning' should add something to the flavour!".

"There's still something missing" came back Fanny. She rummaged round in the vegetable box and pulled out two small onions, which she peeled and placed appropriately at the root of the carrot. "What do you think? Jack's jigglers?".

"This should be a fun dinner," said Tess, planting a sloppy kiss on Fanny, who placed her hand around Tess's neck and pulled her in for some deep tongue work.

Fanny pulled away, saying with a smile, "But we have some desserts to make first". She proceeded to roll out the pastry and lined the eight small pie flans. From the fruit basket, she retrieved four large peaches. Slicing them in halves and removing their stones, she said to Tess, "I have something very special in mind".

Using her paring knife, she carefully carved the peach halves with an even more realistic slit. Finding some glazed cherries in the cupboard, she placed a plump red cherry in the hood at the top of each slit. She topped them with a sprinkle of sugar and cinnamon spice mix.

It was afternoon time, so they made coffees and took them out on the veranda to join Emily. Emily hadn't heard the goings on in the kitchen, being absorbed in her book, 'Lady Chatterly's Lover'. "Did you know this isn't entirely a dirty sexy book. It's really about the Victorian taboo of class boundaries. I feel sorry for Lady Chatterly, who is looked down on because she fell in love with the working class gardener".

Meanwhile, out in the sand-dunes. Pat and Trevor had found a secluded little love nest. The grassy dunes sheltered them from the cool sea breeze, providing privacy and a soft bed for their blanket. Their shirt and shorts of the morning had been discarded and they spent the afternoon in wonderful, gentle, passionate love-making.

With coffee finished, Tess and Fanny stoked up the fire-pit and set the two pots, damper and stew, atop to slow cook for several hours.

The breeze had swung round a little and warmed up, so Tess and Fanny stripped off, set out towels on the banana lounges and with glasses of champagne in hand, settled down for the rest of the afternoon. They were in part shade, but with the warm breeze, they felt sun-screen and c-strings were unnecessary. With legs spread, the warmth on their privates was wonderful; not cunt wateringly arousing, but relaxing like early stage fore-play.

It was almost 5pm when Pat and Trevor wandered back, and soon after, the surfers walked up the hill. "That fresh water pool from yesterday was perfect to rinse off in after the salty surf. Great idea Pat" said Dick.

With beer, cheese and biscuits, they stripped and joined the girls on the veranda for some pre-dinner nibbles.

About 6:30, Tess jumped up saying, "I think the damper and stew will be well and truly ready now. Come and help me carry these pots inside Tim". The damper loaf was turned out to cool. Jack soon proceeded to cut it into steaming hot slices and slabs of butter were set on plates beside it.

With everyone sitting round the table, Tess reached over and lifted the lid off the stew pot. The phallic carrot and testicular onions stood proud on the top of the crust. "Oh my God. What is that?", "What have you two been up to?", "Is that supposed to be Tim or Dick's dick" were some of the comments from around the circle of friends.

"That's our little secret" said Tess as she proceeded to carefully slice the crust open, careful not to cut the phallus, and served out stew to everybody's plates. "I think we girls might eat that after it has cooled down. What do you say girls?".

With stew finished and a couple of beers down, Fanny announced "Anyone for dessert". Bringing her tray of pie flans from the oven, she laid them on the table and declared, "My pièce de rĂ©sistance! 'Peach Vulva' with a red hot cherry and topped with Brazilian crumble".

'Peach Vulva with Cream Pie'

"Wow! Is that modeled on your own?" said Dick. "No! Fanny has bigger flaps and Emily's is an 'innie' so it must be Tess" chimed in Jack. "Whatever! It looks yummy to me" came back Tim.

"Just one thing missing" declared Fanny. "A good peach vulva wouldn't be complete without a 'cream pie'" she said, producing an aerosol can of cream and proceeded to give everyone's serve a serve! There was laughter, chortling and back slapping around the table.

Dick picked his pie up in his hand, saying "There's nothing better than licking a big cream-pie out of a luscious peach vulva", as he plunged his face into his pie, licking and eating. The others were more civilized, using their dessert spoons and forks.

Dick proceeded to give Fanny a big creamy kiss. Laughter spread around the table. Someone picked up the can of cream and squirted some girl's tits and licked them. Someone else poured some champagne over another for some slurping.

In no time, all eight bodies were rolling round the beds, laughing and giggling, slapping and tickling, licking and sucking. There were smears of cream and champagne everywhere.

Dick had a sudden idea. He returned to the dining table and grabbed the still warm carrot phallus and proceeded to bring Fanny to a laughing, screaming orgasm with the vegan dildo.

"Never on Sunday" did someone say? Not in this circle of friends.

(to be continued, Home Again, Home Again!).

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