Sex and Aging

I guess its easy to write-off our wife’s loss of libido to aging and menopause, but there is also an impact of aging on our (men’s) sex life too (if not quite as severe as total loss of libido) that needs to be discussed more.  I am writing this from experience, being in the middle of it, so YMMV.

I come from a history of “hair-trigger” and learnt early on to prolong and enjoy foreplay before “the event”.  And so it was on my first punt some 25 years ago.  It was an overnight business trip away, I was sick of porn and needed the “real thing”.  Now this was before showers in bedrooms so I was washed by the lady from a bowl of warm water (does that give my age away?  It was all of $20 (which I claimed as a business meal allowance)).  Into bed, a little foreplay, then into “it” and, “bam”, it was over in 30 seconds.  So my feeling about my first experience of punting, was “Is that all there is?  What a waste of time and money”.

Fast forward to my middle fifties.  Home “life” had got so bad I was getting quite depressed and so tried punting again.  Fortunately, the first lady I saw was extremely helpful, took command, calmed my nerves, the main event lasted longer than 30 seconds and a most enjoyable time was had all round.  But over the following 3-4 years, I noticed significant changes.

Now of course, condoms reduce sensitivity which help subdue the “hair trigger”, but I then found myself losing my erection mid-stream.  Fortunately, I have a very understanding GP doctor who prescribed Viagra. Wow!  (The pros and cons of Viagra deserve a separate posting).  Not only was I enjoying “the ride” much more, but in combination with my new skills in DATY, my ladies seemed to find more enjoyment in riding a thick, rock-hard cock.  From 30 seconds, I could now last 20-30 MINUTES!  The journey was now more important (and pleasant?) than the “destination”.

But my prolonged fucking sessions masked something else that crept up on me.  I suddenly realised that more and more, I wouldn’t cum at all.  To some degree, it was in fact due to prolonged sessions that in fact decreased my sensitivity.  I discussed this with my understanding doctor, who advised that it was simply due to declining testosterone levels with age, and to just enjoy the ride.

I also noticed something else changing.  When I started punting again, I promised myself a FOTM (after abysmal annual or biennial attempts at home).  Needless to say, I soon found I had an “ache” after a fortnight, and by three weeks, I just had to go and “get my rocks off”. (Yes my young readers, I do remember my youth when the “urge” hit a couple times a day, but I never got the chance back then to “scratch that itch”).  But in the last year or so, I have found that that physical urgency just doesn’t come much any more.  There is a psychological “need” for the warmth and intimacy, but the physical “need” has declined markedly.

In the early stages, I think there was a sense of anger over my past situation, and I set out to visit as many parlours and ladies as I could financially and physically manage.  But I seem to have worked that out of my system and have found a parlour where I have a half a dozen or so lovely ladies that tick all my boxes, and I find much more pleasure in seeing my regulars.

With respect to not cumming very often, I have settled into several different patterns.

1. There are times when I really do need to cum, so I avoid masturbation for at least a week, then in our session, enjoy all the delights and varieties of foreplay, then in the main course, not try and prolong it but with my lady’s assistance with various squeezing and pressure techniques, achieve a happy ending.  I am very lucky in having a couple of favourite ladies who at times, to bring our session across the line, have removed the offending desensitizer for a natural or OWO (BBBJ) finish.
2. Then there are other times when “cumming” just isn’t important to me and my lady and I just enjoy the whole gammut of sexual pleasures including a wide variety of positions of the old fashioned....
3. Finally, with some ladies, the specialty is all oral, and one particular favourite has acquired a taste and provides that most explosive CIM finish ever.

As for the future, that remains to be seen.  I read of men having a fulfilling sex life into their 80’s - if I could be that lucky.

My next age related hurdle will be retirement and the loss of that regular income that has made my punting hobby possible.  Perhaps I will have to become acquainted with a circle of divorcees and widows that need some “comfort”!