Misconceptions About Erections, Orgasms and Ejaculation!

WARNING:- This post is technical with medical anatomical discussions, but bear with me. Enhanced knowledge will lead to understanding when things don't go quite right (ED).

In my previous Penis Project post, I wrote about the 'Penis Conspiracy' and how what goes on in our brain influences our sex life. This post focuses on the physical side with the brain translating sensory input into arousal initiation, triggering the erection process and central in the genital sensory feedback to flood the body with feel-good hormones and orgasm.

The Three Stage Process of Erection

Normal erections generally depend upon 3 processes (ref.): 

1. increased arterial blood flow into the penis by neurological initiation, 
2. cavernosal smooth muscle relaxation, 
3. restriction of venous blood outflow from the penis.

I've included links to various medical websites for more complete descriptions, I focus mostly on the lesser understood aspects.

 (Click for the WebMD article)

From around 2005, understanding of the biochemical processes improved and the inter-relationship of psychological and physiological aspects were better understood. Working backward, the actual erection is caused by inflow of blood into the two 'corpus cavernosa'. This process is triggered by Nitric Oxide (NO), a signalling chemical sent from the nerve endings en-wrapping the cavernosum. (NO is synthesized from L-arginine by NO synthase (NOS)). The NO causes the blood vessel walls to relax encouraging blood inflow.  PDe5 inhibitor drugs like Sildenafil (Viagra) work by increasing bio-availability of Nitric Oxide. It is the signalling from the brain, initiated by a range of all sorts of erotic stimuli, touch, sight, smell, sound, that trigger this process. Conversely, inhibitory brain processes like depression, can suppress this triggering process.

Nitric Oxide is an important  component in general circulatory health. Certain foods and supplements boost Nitric Oxide levels. Whilst these might not be sufficient for treatment of persistent Erectile Dysfunction (ED), a good exercise regime, healthy eating including the above NO boosters, healthy weight level, controlled blood pressure, minimized alcohol consumption and healthy mind-set, will minimize the chances of developing ED.

Having achieved an erection, a separate process retains the erection. The Corpus Spongiosum runs down the under-side of the penis and is responsible for holding the urethra open and restricting the outflow veins so blood is retained, holding the erection. A different Nitric Oxide process (eNO) is involved in retaining an erection. This is also a signalling chemical from nerve endings, but these are triggered by physiological conditions of the erection, specifically 'hematological shear', which is a function of the actual blood flow affected by the flexibility and smoothness of the blood vessel walls and the viscosity of the blood. So a good psychologically aroused state can initiate a good erection, but aging or damaged blood vessels can limit retention. 

Overuse of alcohol affects blood viscosity which can lead to loss of erection, "Brewers Droop", known in Australia as "Fosters Droop". And remember that alcohol shouldn't be taken along with most medications. A little might be fine to relax to start an evening, but too much could deflate not just your ego. And alcohol generally doesn't go well with Viagra leaving you with a pounding headache afterwards.

WARNING:-  Viagra was originally developed for treatment of high blood pressure. It works in erection improvement by lowering blood pressure through release of Nitric Oxide. There are medical conditions that contraindicate its use - get a doctor's check before starting its use. Use the smallest dose needed - there is a maximum recommended dose - over-dosing can cause serious problems.

The Corpus Cavernosum Vessels

Note that the Corpus Cavernosum are in fact two blood vessels of sponge-like tissue, the length of the penis, that fill with blood to effect an erection. These vessels form in the fetus in the very earliest stages during development of the circulatory system. At the time of gender bifurcation, these vessels form either the penis or the female clitoral structure. It is an important lesson in sexuality for men to understand, that the female clitoral structure extends from the external head (analogous the the male glans) and extends internally with two Corpus Cavernosa, behind the labia, around the urethra and join the top wall of the vagina at the 'G spot'. So the female clitoris undergoes a penis like 'erection', swelling and puffing out the labia.

Understanding Orgasms and Ejaculation

The whole sexual arousal cycle is a feedback loop between sensory arousal in the brain flooding the body with hormones, and sensations in the genitals feeding signals back into the brain. In one sense, orgasm is arousal reaching a peak with a final 'explosive' flood of senses then 'collapses' into the 'resolution' phase. In females, orgasm triggers rhythmic contractions of muscles. Clitoral orgasms use muscles around the urethra and vaginal openings, the same muscles used in a male orgasm. A vaginal orgasm is contraction of the kegal muscles across the base of the pelvis and contract along the inner length of the vagina. In men, orgasm and ejaculation are in fact separate events.

Ejaculation is controlled by the sympathetic nervous system in the spinal cord.

In men, arousal causes a build up of ejaculate fluid within the 'bulb of the penis' located at the base. An observant woman might see the urethra on the underside of the penis, swelling and throbbing. This filling up leads to a special feeling of impending, uncontrollable ejaculation, although with practice, 'edging' allows you to pull back from the 'edge', then build up to almost the point of no return again, then pull back again.

With age, erection can in fact inhibit orgasm and ejaculation, with effectively numbing sensations. As the erection starts to deflate, ejaculation might then occur - warning: this condition can lead to condom slippage.

While men experience pelvic contractions, not unlike the female, they are not central to the male orgasm and ejaculation. Pelvic contractions can best be felt during prostate massage. Rhythmic ejaculation contractions primarily are caused by muscles at the base of the penis, rather than pelvic floor, although they are connected.

Origin and Composition of Ejaculate

Probably the biggest misconception, is the origin of ejaculate. Sperm is generated in the testicles and passes up the Vas (a Vasectomy cuts this Vas as a permanent contraceptive measure). The sperm mixes with fluid from the Seminal Vesicle and from the Prostate - by volume the majority is prostatic fluid. The outlet from the prostate joins the urethra through a valve and another valve above the junction stops urine mixing during ejaculation, and conversely ejaculate going back into the bladder (retrograde ejaculation). 

This misconception is perpetuated by porn talk about "draining balls". If anything, it is the prostate that is being 'drained'. 

Ejaculate from a man who has had a vasectomy contains no sperm and won't have a milky colour (so technically, no 'cream-pies'). If a man has had prostatectomy surgery (cutting out the prostate) for Prostate Cancer, there will be virtually no ejaculate and very poor, if any, orgasms (erection and coitus is still possible with an implant or injection, but sorry, no 'happy ending').

V - Verisimilitude - Believable Writing (#AtoZChallenge)

Verisimilitude is the "lifelikeness" or believability of a work of fiction. The concept goes back to Plato and Aristotle, and the dramatic theory of mimesis, the imitation or representation of nature. For a piece of art to hold significance or persuasion for an audience, it must have grounding in reality. But it is the appearance or likeness to the truth, even if it is a far-fetched one.

 

In film, personally, I find English films usually more realistic than that from Hollywood. Hollywood is too obsessed with 'beautiful' people, whereas English film-makers more often use ordinary looking people, warts and all. Good characterization is 'relatable', whereas 'believability ' or realism comes from the script, direction and set.

For us as BLOG writers, believability and relatability will persuade a reader to continue to the end, and hopeful come back to read other posts. This is especially so for erotica writers although typically seeking a viseral response which has its own sense of believability.

In my own work, I have the opposite problem of couching a factual encounter description with some literary license and perhaps some fictionalized wrapping to make it more entertaining to the reader whilst preserving its truthfulness and believability. In "A Bad Habit" I relate an actual cosplay encounter (Nun's costume) and tell it within the fictional scenario of a priest reprimanding a nun. In "The Wicked Wench of Wupert Street", I fictionalize the characters a little bit, Sir Thomas becomes "ST - Super Tongue" and the lady become "The Wicked Wench". But sometimes there is a true story related unembellished ("There's Man A Slip Twixt...") that some think couldn't possibly be true.

Poetry has a different set of issues. It relies mainly on meter and rhyme to convey the emotion of the story. In "The Man From Yarra River - The Ride", I try to convey the rising excitement and adrenaline of a fictional gang bang by parodying the famous Australian poem, "The Man From Snowy River" by Banjo Paterson (as used in the movie of the same name - it tells the story of rounding up the brumbies in the high country). Even if the reader hasn't actually been in a gang bang, I hope the excitement elicited by this poem might make it feel as if it might be realistic, in a literary sense at least.

So aim for some verisimilitude in your BLOG and/or erotica writing. Ask yourself, "Can I actually hear a real person speaking like this?"

 

Click to see who else is taking the challenge. 

D.E. - Dysfunctional Erections (#AtoZChallenge)

Erectile Dysfunction (ED) is one of those conditions that will effect all men as they age, but sexual performance is so deeply ingrained in the male psyche, that ED is often hidden, denied or just not spoken about.

LADIES: Please don't shut off here thinking this is a male topic. This affects couples, and men suffering this need the support, love and encouragement of their partners to work through it. You will probably have to learn together to modify your intimate relationships to allow for these changes.

I see I have covered this subject 10 times over the last 10 years, so I'll try not to cover too much old ground. Follow links for further reading.

I was in my late 50's when it first hit me, losing my erection mid-coitus. A quick visit to my doctor, and a Viagra prescription got me up and going again, but there are side effects. Over time, I started to realise there are multiple facets to this condition. First there is the lack of or loss of erection itself, then there is the decreased sensation/feeling, this in turn leads to inability to orgasm or ejaculate. 

But in this last year, post prostate cancer radiotherapy treatment, I hit rock bottom. Everything was gone, and I wrote "Paradise Lost, Vale Sir Lust".

In researching my ED, I discovered that erection comes in two stages, the initial achievement of erection and secondly maintaining an erection. These stages are driven by different bio-chemical processes, which is why in early cases, erection can be attained but not maintained. Further I found that orgasm and ejaculation are not necessarily correlated. Did you know there is a medical journal, the "International Journal of Impotence Research", dedicated to understanding the underlying processes, the pathologies that leads to dysfunction and the search for medications and methods to counteract such dysfunction?

As I started to read learned research articles (not easy since my doctorate is in computer science and data analysis, not biochemical processes, but my university organic chemistry studies 50 years ago have helped), I started to get a new perspective of the problem and some promising hints into how I might regain some function.

Let me try and describe the erection process in lay terms, stripped of too much biochemical detail. Medical thinking about the causes/processes of ED flipped back and forth over 20 years or more. The thinking was that there were psychological and physiological causes separately. In younger men, psychological causes were considered principle and treatment was around relationships. In older men, physiological causes were prominent, namely ageing of blood vessels causing thickening and decreased flexibility of blood vessels. 

From around 2005, understanding of the biochemical processes improved and the inter-relationship of psychological and physiological aspects were better understood. Working backward, the actual erection is caused by inflow of blood into the two 'corpus cavernosum'. This process is triggered by Nitric Oxide (NO), a signalling chemical sent from the nerve endings enwrapping the cavernosum. (NO is synthesized from L-arginine by NO synthase (NOS)). The NO causes the blood vessel walls to relax encouraging blood inflow.  PDe5 inhibitor drugs like Sildenafil (Viagra) work by increasing bio-availability of NO. It is the signalling from the brain, initiated by a range of all sorts of erotic stimuli, touch, sight, smell, sound, that trigger this process. Conversely, inhibitory brain processes like depression, can disable this triggering process.

The cavernosum run down either side of the penis. The corpus spongiosum runs down the under-side of the penis and is responsible for holding the urethra open and restricting the outflow veins so blood is retained, holding the erection. A different Nitric Oxide process (eNO) is involved in retaining an erection. This is also a signalling chemical from nerve endings, but these are triggered by physiological conditions of the erection, specifically 'hematologial shear', which is a function of the actual blood flow affected by the flexibility and smoothness of the blood vessel walls and the viscosity of the blood. So a good psychologically aroused state can initiate a good erection, but aging or damaged blood vessels can limit retention.

Nerves are involved in both stages and sensory nerves provide feeling/touch sensations back to the brain, so nerve damage (surgical or radiotherapy) or peripheral neuropathy (eg. from diabetes), can also affect various aspects of ED.

Finally, there is the issue of treatment. It is best to take a holistic view, psychologically as well as physiologically. Physiological conditions can be permanent or temporary (eg.alcohol) and the best you can hope for is to moderate underlying conditions eg. diabetes, arteriosclerosis, hypertension etc. As has been mentioned, PDe5 inhibitors have proved generally beneficial in the absence of any other underlying pathology. To improve 'hematologial shear', keep well hydrated. Low testosterone has been linked to lower libido (psychological), but there is no evidence that testosterone supplements improve ED. Similarly, L-arginine supplements are promoted in men's 'health supplements', but a placebo-controlled, crossover comparison found no difference in ED improvement between oral L-arginine and placebo.

In the specific case of ED due to radiotherapy, some general healing of damaged tissue, both cavernosum and nerves, has been achieved with daily low doses of PDe5 inhibitors. Extra high doses of PDe5 inhibitors can also improve erection response and retention, if side effects can be tolerated. EG. Viagra is normally only recommended up to 100mg, but controlled experiments with 150mg and 200mg doses have had some success. The author seems to be having success with 150mg and plans to go for another 'test drive' once his Lady Of Pleasure is out of COVID19 self isolation. The other factor in ED 'recovery' noted in some studies, is frequency of use, even if it is DIY ('Use It Or Lose It' will be addressed in a coming post). 

 
Click to see who else is taking the challenge. 

ED Recovery? The Test Drive

 #F4TFriday

The time has come.

I've been trying a non-invasive method to treat my Erectile Dysfunction (2 year post prostate cancer radiotherapy treatment) for 3 months. As I wrote a couple of weeks ago, there has been a modicum of success with Viagra and cock-ring producing erections that just might be sufficient for coitus. So its time to try it out.

My lustless wife has had no desire for any form of intimacy for decades, so this is not for her. As for me, the days of aching urgent needs, dwindled over the years from daily, to weekly to monthly and the intensity subsided. But now there is no feeling of 'need' any more, just memories of 'that would be nice to have again'. As I face the possibility of widowhood in the next few years, it would be nice to know that I might have something to offer any future partner. Regrets? Sure, I've had a few!

But for now, all I have are some LOP 'buddies', that are understanding, willing and warm and intimate. My carer duties have become almost full time, so the best I can manage is to extend a shopping trip by an hour.

I finally manage to arrange a time. Miss C welcomes me warmly, despite it being 12 months since our last encounter. She reassures me that my situation is not uncommon. Being a middle aged SW, she has quite a number of older clients with post-prostate treatment conditions, including implanted pumps, rods, cock-rings and caverject injections.

As we snuggle up for a kiss and cuddle, a relaxing warmth enfolds me. How nice is that primal need for the intimate touch of another human body. C wriggles in closer, worming her cleft over my modest erection. She assures me that it is stiff enough and its hotness is as good as ever. I don't feel anything especially arousing, just part of the overall warmth of intimacy. I do however feel C's wetness and her own increasing need as she works her clit over me.

Its time I satisfied her needs. I slide down her body and let the old tongue-engine loose on her lady bits. Well at least my tongue is still in excellent working order and all the old sensations are still good.

After she had come down from her orgasm, she asks if I am ready to enter her. She tells me she needs to feel filled. I warn her that condoms decrease sensitivity even more and I'm not sure I can even penetrate. She suggests we try a super-thin non-latex condom and give it a go.

As I slide in, there is relief that my erection has passed the test. Even though there is no feeling of arousal, it is warm and nice to feel the ultimate of human intimacy. But orgasm for me just isn't on the radar.

Sadly our time all too soon comes to an end. As we chat, shower and dress, I tell C that I came expecting that this might be my last time. But I thank her that she has reassured me that there is some sort of future for limited intimacy.

Thank God for these wonderful Ladies Of Pleasure that give men like me, some warmth and intimacy in the autumn of our life.

PS. My visit to Miss C used my last Viagra script, and its still a month or so to the Dr's appointment. So its been a couple of weeks with no daily Viagra. Sadly, even with cock-ring, there is no hint of erection and zero sensation. So whilst my 'treatment' has enabled an erection sufficient for coitus as needed, there appears to have been no  'healing' for long-term improvement. However, I shall continue my 'treatment' for another 6 months and see.

(Click this banner to read other Thoughts on Hindsight & Regrets)

Paradise Lost - Vale Sir Lust

Occasionally we read about those early teen years of discovery, perhaps of illicit liaisons. But we seldom read of the other end of life. Sure we hear of changes during menopause, and of course there is the perpetual whinging of married men saying their wives have lost their libido. Erectile Dis-function gets an occasional mention, but Viagra and Cialis take care of that.

Loss of male libido can have psychological or medicinal causes. But outright physical loss of sexual desire (lust) and function, just silently slides under the covers. 

My ED started at around 60 and I posted "Sex and Aging". But Viagra ushered in a new era for me, but orgasm/ejaculation was less, partly due to the Viagra effects. By age 65, I blogged "As Lust Fades". At 69, prostate cancer was detected -  I opted for radiotherapy, since prostatectomy was more likely to cause impotency. The treatment was a breeze and I celebrated every week of "The 39 Days".

In the 2 years since the radiotherapy, the cancer appears to have gone. But sexual function and libido have just about died. At first, it wasn't just inability to orgasm from sex, but sensitivity and feeling was declining. Add in condoms for transactional sex, the old adage of it being like taking a shower in a rain-coat, was all too true. With the prostate having been zapped, its functionality has declined so the volume of ejaculate is not much more than a dribble. Further, I have found the ED has worsened to the point where even a maximum dose of Viagra doesn't produce a workable erection. Neither porn nor masturbation can produce an erection.

The Urologist suggested that a mechanical implant could help (rod or inflatable balloon), but with no willing partner, no feeling sensations, and no orgasms, there is no point. Alas, Paradise has been lost.

Fortunately, the tongue is still in good working order. But I can't bring myself to pay $300/hr for a kiss and cuddle.

Vale, Sir Lust

Alas Sir Lust, I knew him well, a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. He has borne me on his bed a thousand times, and now, how abhorred in my imagination it is! My ire rises at it. Here hang those balls that have been kissed I know not how oft. Where be thy thrusts now? Your gambols? Your songs? Your flashes of merriment that were wont to set the whores on a roar? No one now to mock your limp dangling?

(PS. So what happens to this blog now with the loss of inspiration? Well I still have lots of memories to draw on so I will probably defer to fictional erotic writing.)

(Click to see who else is posting Food For Though about Libido)

Celebration

I mentioned in "I Lust, Therefore I Am" that I had got the all clear from my prostate biopsy. Well that was quite a roller-coaster ride there for a while, worth celebrating at the end.

I like to keep an eye on my health, so almost 15 years ago, I started getting annual PSA (Prostate Specific Antigen) screening blood tests done. My PSA levels have slowly been creeping up that whole time until early this year they passed the standard upper limit for normal range. My DRE (Digital Rectal Examination) indicated enlargement but no lumps. Urinary continence symptoms also indicated that it was time to get checked for Prostate Cancer with a biopsy. Even though elevated PSA levels indicate cancer in only about 30% of cases, the "C" word still gives the shivers. And prostatectomy is notorious for ill side effects - about 60% have continence issues and over 30% have erectile and nerve issues. OMG, the very thought of never having an erection again or sexual feeling in my organ is - well, disturbing, depressing, disastrous. Thank goodness my tongue is still in good working order.

Anyway, on to the biopsy. The worst part was the waiting. Afterwards there was no pain, just slight discomfort no different than butt-plug play. The pre-op notes mentioned that there could be some blood in the urine and ejaculate afterwards. OMG.  I'm sure my daughter would say "You're a wimp dad. Women bleed every month". Oh well, at least that flushed out within 2 days. But how does one "flush out" bloody ejaculate from the prostate? Well it had to be DIY, but at my age, once a week is about my limit, so it took over 3 weeks to clear.  So much for seeing my favourite Lady Of Pleasure for a celebration the afternoon after, should I get the all clear from the doctor at the follow-up meeting 1 week after the biopsy.

But the time did arrive.  I was clear, an opportunity for an evening out to myself arose, I was loaded with Viagra and ready to party. (Thank goodness that Viagra is now off patent restriction and the price has dropped from $18 to $4 per 100mg pill. Whoopy!!). It had been 2 months since I last saw my favourite Lady Of Pleasure, "Special K", and I was looking forward to a great celebration (God, how did I ever get by on 2 years "between drinks"?). I have written before about "Munching on Special K" and "DFF - Deep French Fucking" so I don't need to repeat myself, except to say that she was as pleased to see me as I was to see her and a most satisfying playtime celebration was had.

I had mentally made a "Plan B" of visiting a second LOP should my first attempt at post-biopsy celebration not go as well as hoped. But I needn't have worried. "K" was as accommodating, passionate, enthusiastic, horny and orgasmic as ever - I wonder what she was celebrating?

So I celebrate "Many happy returns"...

As Lust Fades

There are plenty of comments around about women losing their libido, usually following menopause (usually from their bewildered partners). But men are very reluctant to admit it of themselves.  This is sometimes called "andropause", although medically, this is an ill-defined term, medically implying a decrease in testosterone levels.

Its not that I'm not interested in sex any-more - far from it.  And I still enjoy sex very much.  Its just that there is no 'urge', no 'stirring in the loins', no 'automatic boners', no 'morning glory'.

Let me back up to the start of my 'problems'.  It must be five or six years ago now when I found my erections wilting mid-session (mind you, that particular lady wasn't exactly very encouraging).  I spoke to my doctor about ED and he prescribed Viagra. Wow! But the after effects are not nice, so I halved the dose, then halved again, still getting a good usable erection with some reduction in side effects.  In time, I switched to Cialis with slightly less side effects and improved erections for several days (see "4 o'clock in the morning").  But last year, the gastric reflux 'heart burn' was getting quite severe - the doctor ordered a gastroscopy and some acid-burn scarring was found in the lower oesophagus. So I've stopped Cialis and I'm now trying herbal 'Viagermax' which in combination with a good cock-ring is serving me well.

BUT.  Whilst medication has helped my ED and I am enjoying 'the journey' better, I have found I am reaching 'the destination' less often (ie. failure to cum).  Neither oral nor Mrs Palmer get me over the line much anymore.  Only a small number of ladies get me there because of their technique, which I wrote about as "DFF Deep French Fucking".

But fading lust is something more.  When I first liberated myself, I set myself a goal/limit of once a month (diarized as FOTM).  Now dear diary, you know how it is, once you are onto a good thing you naturally want more.  So 4-weekly crept back to 3-weekly, and on occasions the urge became an ache that just begged to be salved.  I remember talking with a wonderful regular at the time about which was better, more frequent 'quickies' or longer lingering encounters less often - we decided that there was a need for both. When I found a bordello close to work with particularly enticing ladies, I found myself slipping out for early, long 'lunches' more often - mind you their loyalty scheme of a free visit every 10 kept me regular.  I found that at about 10-12 days, the urge was stirring (I was in my late 50's, not early twenties where 10 hours would be closer to the mark).  So into the third week I was planning my calendar for a slow day for a 'long lunch'.

But now I'm a retired pensioner, with restricted discretionary disposable income, and more difficulty finding "me time" away from home, I only manage to catch up with my buddies once a month.  And I also find the "lust" has gone.  There is no physical 'need' to 'get my rocks off' any more - 'blow and go' is a thing of the past.  My sexual desires are much more volitional, a desire for intimacy, of companionship, etc. (still not available at home).  My issue now is finding suitably accommodating ladies.

On the physical side, my next concern is where is my prostate going - I've had BPH for 15 years and my PSA level has been slowly creeping up to now be at the top of the 'normal range', so I am at the monitor closely (6 monthly) stage before resorting to biopsy.  Is an enlarged prostate the cause of 'not cumming'?

So dear reader, you understand now why my blogging has fallen off - less source material.  But I trust the chronicles of my journey might be of some help to other men, perhaps struggling with some sexual issues and can't/won't discuss them with anyone.  Don't be shy - drop my a line/comment, even anonymously.

With lust unsatisfied or when lust fades,

I'm just not my 'nice' self anymore!

The Wicked Wench of Wupert Stweet

"There was movement on the forums, for the word had passed around
That the MILF from "Butterflies" had got away,
And had joined the Wild Ladies - she was worth a thousand pound,
So all the cracks had gathered to the fray.
All the tried and noted punters from the brothels near and far
Had mustered at "The G" overnight,
For the punters love hard riding where the Wild Ladies are,
And Sir Thomas snuffs the battle with delight."

(with apologies to ABP)

(Edit Jan.2019 - Since Cristal first inspired the above parody verse, I have finally completed a full length piece, titled The Rider.)
---

From all reports this young blond filly of ample assets with her butter wouldn't melt in her mouth" English Rose looks and seductive accent, continues to seduce the men of Melbtropolis. Despite her "Hot Babe" tag, this is really the "Wicked Wench of Wupert Stweet".  

Its time she got a good licking - this is a job for "Super Tongue" ("I've eaten more pussies than Sunday roasts!").

Meanwhile, in the grey canyons of the business district of Melbtropolis, mild mannered business analyst Sir Thomas, slips out for an early long lunch.  He boards his trusty #109 steed, flashing his Seniors Card at the ticket inspector, and heads on down to "The G".

Cristal ("The Wench") was busy as usual.  ST had rung the day before to ensure he got a lunch-time booking, but only 1:15 was available. But even now, she is running 15 minutes late.  He settles in the waiting room with just women's daytime TV and a NW magazine for company (not even a 'Ralph' - wtf)!

Cristal eventually comes in, cunningly disguised in an all-over tan and skimpy fluoro bikini that barely holds in her newly acquired puppies.

Up in the room, Sir Thomas slips into the shower cubical and steps out as "Super Tongue"!  

On Cristal's return, there is some "dancing" around each other, sizing each-other up - discovering each-other's delectations.  They move into a clinch and Cristal lifts her top and thrust her orbs into his face, "Wrap your tongue around these!" ST thinks, "I'm supposed to be giving her the 'licking'. She shouldn't be demanding it!"

There is writhing and squirming, jockeying for position till Cristal gains the upper hand and is attacking ST with her tongue and mouth. But ST, despite being in the under-dog position pulls her leg over and starts giving that English pussy a good old Aussie licking.

She rolls off and pulls him up to a standing position in front of the mirror, then on her knees, ST meets DT (Deep Throat).  But ST regains the upper hand, and pushes her back onto the bed, head over the edge and continues the face-fuck, then pulls her legs up over his shoulders for more lip-licking 69 (is there even a name for this position?)

But Cristal, showing her amazing flexibility, extricates herself, and standing, still in her stillettos, with one leg shoulder high against the mirror, demands, "Well are you going to fuck this English pussy now?"  What follows, is a series of moves and positions that would do the Australian Ballet justice, before Cristal throws ST to the floor onto a pillow and proceeds to impale herself on him, both forward and reverse cow-girl.

But ST regains control, and has Cristal spread-eagled on her back on the bed.  He crawls up the bed, pausing to apply more oral lubrication, before pinning her under him.  A DFK tongue battle ensures.  She lifts her legs high over his shoulders to achieve maximum penetration, and much pleading to The Almightly can be heard.

As her shudders finally subside, ST rolls off, and she dives on his member to slake her thirst at the fountain of love.

Half exhausted, they both lie back for a cuddle and chat about love and marriage and internet forums.

But its not long before she can feel a nudge in her crotch as ST rises for more. She swings round and licks and sucks some more, and ST gives her the two-finger salute.  Before long she is bucking again and reaches for another rubber and has barely got it on before the buzzer sounds. But do you think a buzzer is going to stop this Wicked Wench when she wants something ("its all about me!"). She is on board now and riding like a woman possessed, until in another body shuddering orgasm, she gets what she wants! Her pussy has clamped tightly around ST who continues pumping as tremors continue to ripple through her body, till he explodes too. (OMG, twice in an hour, its unheard of for the old fella).

Now, totally exhausted, they both fall back to catch their breath. The buzzer goes a second time, and ST slowly gets up then gingerly stands on wobbly legs. He showers and slips back into his disguise as mild-mannered Sir Thomas.

The final score? A 2 all draw!
---

As Sir Thomas settles back in the 109 to catch his breath and wait for some strength to return to his knees, he wonders:

"Who was that woman?  Was that really the 'Wicked Wench', or was it in fact 'Wonder Woman' stripped bare?"

And so Sir Thomas slips back into work a bit after 3pm (it was an extra long "Lunch") - little do the juniors realise that The Old Man (TOM) is in fact the fearless defender of Twuth, Justice and the Punters’ Way!

As TOM settles down at his desk, there is a stirring in his loins - Oh no! Is it the delicious memory, or the remnants of vitamin V, or ... no, it couldn't be ... not "Cristallization"?  He licks his lips and wiggles his tongue - no, thank goodness - "Super Tongue" is safe for another day!
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PS. Apart from some literary license, no facts were harmed in the production of this review.  Everything else should be taken with a grain of Cialis and was written with tongue firmly in pussy.  All allusions, alliterations and aspersions are altogether intentional.

4 O'Clock in the Morning

(This is a refresh of a post from June 2012 for 'MMMMondays'.)

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It’s 4 o’clock in the morning and I wake with the most wonderful hard-on. Its not the “aching to get my rocks off” sort of hard-on.  Rather, I am so warm and comfortable and totally relaxed.  It was just 2 evenings ago that I had an awesome time with “amazing Grace with the luscious labia”!  I am still floating on air and basking in the after-glow.  I read that for men over 60, Viagra is excreted much more slowly, with double the “half-life” of a 40 year-old.  Perhaps that’s helping this morning.

 

I tingle as my finger-tips caress the silky skin of my shaft, just as Grace did.  As I circle the rim of my glans it is just as Grace pleasured her labia and clit with my tip.  I am in total bliss, dreaming and replaying our time together.

I must have drifted off to sleep for a few minutes, because I wake again with a bit of a droop, but as I zone back into “that night”, my hardness is throbbing in no time.  I remember how Grace collapsed across my chest, having come for the umpteenth time, totally relaxed, holding my thickness inside her.  She said she wished she could take “it” home as her personal “toy”.

I can feel her sex engulfing me again. I am ready for more now, so I reach into me bedside drawers for a rubber and roll it on.  My hand and Grace’s pussy merge into one, round and round, up and down, till we come together in a glorious release.  I flop back, totally relaxed and warm in my cocoon.

I think Grace must be awake in her bed this morning as well.  She enjoys pleasuring herself of a morning.  I think we must be “channeling” each other today to our mutual pleasure.

I drift off again, till I am startled awake with the alarm.  Its time to get ready for a new week of work and get Lady Thomas up and dressed and settled for the day - thank goodness we don’t share the same bed anymore.

Click to see who else's Monday was "MMMMM"!

Viagra's Ups and Downs

I have posted previously an anecdotal story of the dangers of Viagra overdose (see "Cunning Conversations - Viagra is Not for Boys" on "TheCunningLinctus.blogspot.com"),  but I now write from personal experience about "normal" use.

Firstly let me reiterate that Viagra and related Cialis are prescription medications, since there are medical conditions that contra-indicate their use (certain heart conditions).  Always have a doctor's consultation first.  These medications are prescribed for Erectile Dysfunction and if you don't suffer from ED, then their use just for the 'high' is unwise.

I was in my late 50's when I first started suffering the embarrassment of 'running out of steam' mid-stream (if you will excuse the mixed metaphors).  My doctor first tried me on one 100mg dose of Viagra with wonderfully hard results (but followed by side effects described below).  I also then realised that the hard coating made the tablet impossible to break in half.  I then tried a 50mg dose with almost as good results and less side-effects.

Considering their cost (around AU$70 for a packet of 4, and 50mg and 100mg sizes are around the same price - but do shop around since the price varies quite a bit between pharmacies) - I opted for the 100mg dose and use a craft knife/saw to cut them in half, thus effectively halving my per dose cost.  I have tried Cialis recently, but they seem to come in only one size which are a lot smaller and cannot be cut - they cost around AU$140 for a pack of 8.  There are also on-line/mail-order suppliers, but I'm suspicious.

"Ups"

The chemical's excretion rate is slower with age, so at 60 one can enjoy the effects for a good 24 hours (remember you need to take your tablet at least 30 minutes before 'required').  It's so nice to wake up the morning after with a hot hard-on - better yet if you have someone to share it with - sigh, no such luck for me.

There is a myth that you end up with a 'permanent' erection (for the duration) - this is false - you will be 'full' but flaccid until 'stimulated'.  You will be slow to come down after ejaculation (so be careful your lady-friend doesn't continue to enjoy herself and end up with a condom slippage).  You will probably also find your self ready for round 2 (or 3) sooner (decreased “refractory” period).

With Erectile Dysfunction, you may also have started losing sensitivity and take longer to come (if at all).  Viagra/Cialis does NOT help this.  So you may find that you can keep going for as long as your lady is up for it - forget the 'happy ending' and enjoy the journey.

"Downs"

Side effects are dose dependant and vary between users - some people claim Cialis has fewer side effects.

The first side-effect is flushing of the skin, particularly of the face - no big deal - but might be a 'give-away' to the wife!

Head-aches are common after 3-4 hours and doubly so with alcohol.

Intestinal gastric effects also occur, being gastric reflux (indigestion) and next day what I call "Teflon bowel".

If you have a predisposition to peripheral capillary bleeds (nose or haemorrhoids) there is a chance you might suffer a minor bleed.

Then there is the chance of condom 'accident' described above.

Summary

Absolutely the best thing ever.  It will keep me going into my 70s for as long as I can afford it (and the ladies).

Wishing you all a very Happy, Hard New Year.

Wikipedia (http://http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sildenafil) has an excellent, full write-up and lots of references for more details).

V2 - a Hot Cougar MILF

This was the Monday of the 3rd week of January. Punters seemed to be out in force, probably feeling frisky after a sexless Christmas and New Year (such is the effect of family holidays, visiting relatives and school holidays).  The little foyer was like peak-hour at at the railway station.  Regulars A, J and V1 were already in bookings and J, G, B and V2 were intro'ing - I was relegated to the foot of the stairs.

V2 quips, "Do I want the 5 hours booking?" - I like her sense of humour.  We quickly retire upstairs (V2 has been called in especially - she normally works W-Th-F nights).  I had received a phone call concerning an urgent family situation whilst traveling up William St. but it can wait 30 minutes.

It was my first meeting with V2, but we hit-it-off straight away. V2 is of Malaysian-Chinese ancestry (with a touch of Dutch she tells me).  At a guess I would put her as over-40 with a trim, taut, terrific frame.  She is a good mature conversationalist, with a good sense of hurmour and a confident personality.

In no time, V2 is demonstrating her excellent oral skills.  She obviously likes what she is eating and asks if she can sit on me.  I suggest that for a start she sit on my face.  Well she could hardly swing her leg around quickly enough.  She is spasming in no time and I am almost drowning (she admits to being a bit of a 'squirter').

Then with a sense of urgency, she wants to feel my thickness inside her and swings a round to sit on me, but changes her mind, asking for mish position for deeper penetration.  Her vocal exhortations match her thrusting till she come to a quivering climax.  Her involuntary squeezing is replaced by incredibly good muscle control till she brings me off shortly after herself.

It has been a long time since I can remember such an intense, quick completion. We collapse back and chat about Chinese New Year, cooking, Viagra and 2nd rounds.  I get the distinct impressions she would be ready for round #2 soon but I know I wouldn't before our 30 minutes is up.  She finishes with an average massage (she readily admits that massage is not her forte).

Probably the one thing missing was some DFK and cuddling.  It was pretty full on from the start, getting stuck straight into it.  Perhaps next time when we have got to know each other better.

With a "quickie divorce" kiss at the door, I head back to work. (The family situation proved to be a false alarm).

I have a distinct feeling that there will be an after-hours work function I will have to attend one wed, Thurs. or Friday evening soon.  I will make sure I give ourselves more time next time.

Cunning Conversations - “Viagra is not for ‘Boys’”

Having enjoyed the fruits of my Viagra, one of my regular ladies started telling about a bad experience with Viagra.

One afternoon, two teenagers came into her parlour to celebrate the 18th birthday of one of them.  He had raided his father’s Viagra supply and thinking if one is good for his father, then all four in the packet would be a great birthday present for himself.  He was barely out of the shower and he was rock hard.  By the time he was on the bed, he was writhing in agony.  Needless to say, sex was out of the question.  The lady called the parlour madam and an ambulance was called. 

 
He was carried off on a stretcher to hospital, very red faced and in dreadful pain.  I am told that the ER procedure in such cases is a needle into the penis to relieve the blood pressure (and pain). 

 
The lesson to be learned is that potent medication should only be taken on doctor’s instructions and then only the recommended dose.  Viagra should not be taken purely as a recreational drug.

Booty Buddies?

I first started seeing M at a parlour more than 2 years ago.  We had immediately ‘clicked’ with similar senses of humour and interests, despite an 18 year age difference.  M provided a very passionate service, aiming to make her clients feel as if they were “making love with her” (her words).  In time, she asked if I would be interested in seeing her privately as she hated the time limitations in the parlour.  We exchanged mobile phone numbers and in time some friendly phone banter developed and we started using real names instead of our “working/punting” names (M became T and I became G).

There are several equivalent terms for this sort of arrangement, 'Booty Buddy' 'Fuck Buddy' and 'Friends With Benefits'.

Then early last year, M/T had a small medical accident (no, not that sort - dental in fact) and took time off work.  Her dental situation was addressed and after a couple of false starts I finally got to make that private visit.

I took an afternoon ‘sickie’, had bought a bottle of Cab-Merlot the night before, then a bunch of red roses on the way out.  It’s an hour’s drive from work to her seaside cottage, so I stopped half way for a mouth-wash and dose of Viagra (full tablet - bad move - with wine, ended up with a whopper of a head-ache that evening).  

I received a very warm welcome, big hugs and passionate kisses. Had a quick show-around her lovely cottage.  In the kitchen, we arranged the roses into a vase, then opened the wine.  We settled in the lounge with our wine and cuddled up for a lovely catch-up chat.  M/T has decided to give up the parlour and still has difficulty shaking off her old “M” personna. It’s been over 3 months and T (no longer M) is as horny as anything.

Two glasses down, we decide to retire to the bed-room. I open my "punting kit" on the bed-side table - massage oil, lube and rubbers. We cuddle some more, and help each other undress.  T is down to bra and knickers.  She finds a hanger for my cloths, concerned I might get dog hair on them from the floor (thank goodness the dogs have been put outside).  I replace my knickers with the "pyjama G" I have packed and T turns me around admiringly.

We slip into her big old bed with big fluffy pillows and eider-down and enfold each other in each-others arms with more deep passionate kisses. I tell her how honoured I am to be  asked to come into her private home and to share her private bed.  This simply elicits another big kiss and cuddle. There is lots of caressing and I kiss her neck, nibbling her ears and kiss down to her breasts, gently easing aside her bra.  With one arm around her I mange the one-handed unclipping for which she congratulates me.  I now have full access to her glorious 38DDs and my kissing quickly has her pert nipples rosy pink, hard and erect.

Our hands are all over each-other now, breasts, backs, thighs, legs, privates.  She spreads her legs for me as I ease her nickers off.  She is very wet under my exploring fingers. I kiss my way down to her clit.  I've worked my way down the bed now till I have full access to her love petals.  As I lick and nibble her love lips swell and are opening, and my face is getting wet from her juices. Within 5 minutes she is arching her back and stiffening as a series of orgasms sweep through her body.

I pull away since she is very sensitive now.  Her hands slide into the band of my G-string and I assist her to slide them off. With T's immediate appetite sated for the moment, I kissed my way up her body.  Just as I reached her mouth to kiss her once more, OMG, we just slipped together - no conscious effort, no fumbling, not planned (at this time) nor expected.  I froze - WTF - no condom.  What do I do? What do I say? Do I apologize?  I wasn't ready for fucking just yet.  But, God it felt good.

As I eased out, I asked if T would like a massage.  I reached for the massage oil on the bedside table and proceeded to give T my best, most sensual, all-over, front and back, massage.

Finally, with T totally relaxed and me a little worn, we lay down, side-by-side, cuddling and totally relaxed.  

After 5 minutes or so, T pulled my to her and whispered, "Come here" and pulled me over onto her.  As we kissed, she spread her legs and as I slid between them, we just slipped into full coupling again.  This was no accident any more.

God, T was so hot and wet and horny.  It must have been 4 months since she had had any man.  I knew that she had had her last monthly STI test back then, and I had had a clear test around the same time.  I had been "snipped" some 30 years ago so I knew "au naturalle" was quite safe for us at this time.  T had always followed the "safe sex" protocol at "work", so goodness knows how long it had been for her since she had gone bare-back - it had probably been 5-10 years for me.  God it felt good.

This was no longer a "client service", nor sex for fun, nor just because it feels great. This was a deep down primordial "need" to be loved, to be wanted, to be needed, to be joined in flesh and spirit.  Despite the passion of our ensuing fucking, I paced myself as much as I could.  When covered, I don't come easily these days, but now the sensation was awesome. I could feel ever ridge in her pussy and the slightest squeeze, twist and turn. And I knew that T could feel every twitch of my cock. It was hardening even more and swelling now, so I asked T, "How would you like me to come?" (Now T has quite a taste for cum and I have enjoyed numerous, explosive blow-jobs from her and she swallows every single drop). 

But today was different - she had a special need. "I want to feel your cum pumping deep up inside me" she replied. "Only on one condition" I responded, "That I can lick you out". No words were needed to answer me, as she wrapped her legs around my waist and pulled me as deep as possible into her, lifting her hips to thrust against me, twisting and writhing against my pelvis. Her arms wrapped around my neck and pulled me into wild passionate kissing. We fucked with wild abandon till my body stiffened and my hips involuntarily thrust my cock as deep as possible into her hot, hot cunt, pumping, pumping, pumping my creamy cum, deep, deep, deep up inside her.

As I slowly subsided from my orgasm, T squeezed my still semi-hard cock (thank you Viagra), holding it tightly inside herself as her own spasms continued. Finally we collapsed. I had a smile on my face as broad as a Cheshire cat's, and kissed T again, gently. I kissed my way down T's body to her sopping wet, red hot cunt. My cum juices were just starting to trickle out. Now I don't normally have a taste for (male) cum, but the mixture of my cum and her pussy juices had a heady aroma and our well stirred cream-pie tasted yummy.

T then called me to "Come up here" and I offered her my cock for her to lick and suck our combined cum and pussy juices off it till it was completed licked clean.

We collapsed onto the bed, entwined in each other arms. Our bodies glowed with the post coital sheen of perspiration. I think we must have dropped off to sleep together for 5 minutes or more.

When we finally woke and got up to shower, T exclaimed, "Look!  You've christened my sheets" - I felt honoured!

Although we had never discussed money, her original invitation implied a "client" visit, but wow, this morning was a real "booty call". Even so, I knew her financial situation was strained since finishing work, so I left a discreet "gift" on her bedside table.

We unwound in the lounge, sipping chai lattes, listening to "Love Songs of the Sixties" and chatting some more.  She mentioned that she had met someone and had started dating semi-seriously.  I was the only (other) man she was “seeing” since leaving “the industry”.  I reassured her that at any time, if she felt our “relationship” was inappropriate, she just had to say and I would back-away.  In many ways, we had something more than a “service provider/client” relationship. Over the last couple of years we had shared many things about our private situations.  In T’s words, we were “survivors” and were “there for each other”.  Over the coming visits and months, we never did have “that conversation”, though I did continue bringing presents.

And so reluctantly, I slipped my suit coat on, and after a long lingering kiss at the door, headed off to home in the fading twilight.